Spilling Life Tea

Blog about all things lifestyle, home, fashion and being a woman.

Why you should book an online counselling appointment

If you have been following me for a while you will know I suffer from mental health issues. I have never hidden this, In fact, this blog was started as an outlet for me, when I was going through a very dark period in my health. I struggle with depression and anxiety.
woman getting counselling help

I want to talk today about telehealth, This term gets branded about but how many of us really know what it means? We live in a fast-paced world, where everything is accessed via the internet. Did you know you can get health care through the internet? Yes, everything is now available to us via the touch of a button and one of the best parts of this is for people like me who suffer from mental health problems. We all know we can reorder prescriptions online and who hasn't googled their symptom before bothering the doctor. ( I do not recommend this) But there are so many resources available to us now than ever before.

I know when I was suffering from anxiety leaving my house was a huge issue for me and this would be the perfect solution to that. Not only that but they have thousands of helpful articles on their site for you to have a read through. They have everything from articles about depression and anxiety to different types of therapy it is a wonderful free resource to utilise. I know I will be using it.

The reason an online counsellor is better?

1. You can talk to them from the comfort of your own home.

2. You will have access to someone who specialises in your mental health problem.

3. No waitlists. You will be able to get an appointment when you need it.

4. Individual needs, If you would prefer to chat with a counsellor via webcam you can or if you prefer
to messages this is also an option. I know face to face meeting can be intimidating. So this will elevate those concerns.

5. Less clinical. I know this one seems strange but I know the clinical feel around medical practices can be off-putting. I know I feel more comfortable in an environment I know.

6. More affordable, Prices for therapy can be through the roof these days but going down the online route will help you save money.

7. More access, Online counselling is accessible to anyone who has an internet connection. This is fantastic for people like me who live very rurally. My nearest councillor would be an hours drive or more. 

8. More privacy. I know this one always concerned me, I live in a small community and I worried about everyone knowing I was receiving counselling. I am not embarrassed but it added to my anxiety.

The first step to getting help is always the hardest. If you are struggling, do not hesitate to book in for an appointment to get some help. I am a huge advocate of counselling and without it, I would not be the person I am today. There is no shame in getting help if anything it shows how strong you are. We only get one life lets live it to its best.

Five Symptoms That Have Simple Solutions

Life isn’t perfect and neither is our health most of the time. A lot of us go through life with minor pains and aches that we consider inconsequential. However, a lot of the time, these can be symptoms of underlying dangers. They can also be easily dealt with if we only pay more attention to our body and refrain from ignoring it. If you have some long-term unexplained problems, you should consider getting them checked out. Think of how much easier life maybe if you were rid of them. Think of what might be underneath the surface, potentially threatening your life.
woman lying on bed in pain

Aches and pains
There are a lot of physical aches and pains that we can develop over the years. A lot of us might consider them to be the natural consequences of ageing and our lifestyles. That may be right. But they might also be very treatable. From ergonomic chairs to exercises that might make you a little more limber and pain-free for the day. Do your research and find what works for you.

Dizzy spells
Sometimes out of the blue, sometimes more regularly, we might suffer from dizzy spells. Momentary lapses of balance, often accompanied by troubled vision and feelings of lightheadedness. There are some reasons we might naturally come across these from time to time with no concern. Fatigue and hunger can lead to them. However, if they’re more common and come with other side effects, you need to get them checked out. In particular, chest pains or vomiting from a dizzy spell should never be ignored.

Lacking sleep
We all know that sleep is key to a healthy lifestyle. Sometimes, we may not be sleeping because of stress or anxiety throughout the day. These can be just as detrimental as the physical causes of lack of sleep. The rest of our life can suffer as a result of lack of sleep. We can even put ourselves in danger. Find the cause of your trouble sleeping and try to eliminate it.

Shortness of breath
Another commonly ignored symptom is a shortness of breath. We can all expect to get short of breath after we spend a good hour on the treadmill. However, if you find your breath becoming short while walking, or even after a period of talking, there can be some more serious causes. Some people have difficulty breathing when bending or lying down, too.
downstates this could equally be a sign of some serious heart conditions.

Heart palpitations
Another sign of serious heart conditions is heart palpitations. Even if it’s only once in a blue moon, you should not ignore chest pains or irregular feelings in your chest. It can be a sign of arrhythmia. Arrhythmia, when treated, is fairly easy to fight. Left alone, however, it can you at much larger chances of a heart attack. As soon as you feel heart palpitations or chest pains, get yourself an appointment with your doctor.


How to get the flawless skin of your dreams

If you want to have the kind of smooth, flawless and radiant skin that requires no photoshopping; the kind of skin that makes everyone around you feel envious, you’ve come to the right place.  I am not only a qualified makeup artist but I have a qualification in facials too. I think it is so important for any makeup artist to really know skin. Right here is a collection of the greatest skincare tips of all time. Read them, remember them and implement them if you want to have flawless skin.

Drink water
One of the most important thing to the body and the skin is hydration. Your body needs to be hydrated. This is, of course, the same for the skin. Your body needs to flush out the toxins. Drinking at least 8 glasses of water a day will show visible improvement in your skin.

Use a Mist Moisturizer
If you mist your skin and then moisturize it, you’re doing it wrong and spending more money than you really need to on your skincare regime, You see, if you use mist and then add a moisturizer to your skin, it will only dry your skin out. It’s much better to use a product like the Body Shop’s Vitamin E Face mist, which will mist and moisturize effectively in one fell swoop. It’ll save you money too.

Apply Sunscreen with a Sponge
It’s a no-brainer that if you want your skin to look youthful and radiant, even as you age, you need to apply sunscreen each and every day. If you already do this, you’re on on the right track, but if you’re applying that sunscreen with you5r fingers, you haven't quite cracked it yet.

The best way to apply sunscreen is using a sponge or beauty blender, which will not only stop your skin from feeling tacky and making it more difficult for you to apply makeup effectively but also ensure that the sunscreen penetrates more deeply for better protection. It’s way less messy too!

Change Your Razor Blades Regularly
Men and women who use razor blades to remove unwanted hair should change their razor blades more frequently than the often do if they want to have flawless skin. How often should you change your razor blades? Ideally, you should change them after around five uses, but if you shave every day or so and you have thick hair, you may need to change them sooner. If you keep them for longer, not only will they stop being quite so effective, leading to stubble and cuts, but they will also be pretty dirty, and that dirt could cause skin infections which look and feel unpleasant, too.

Exfoliate Longer, Not Harder
If you want to really get rid of that dead, dull skin for a fresh-faced look (and who doesn’t), you might be tempted to start really scrubbing yourself raw with your exfoliant of choice. Not only could this be quite painful and leave you with unattractively red skin, rather than the radiant glow you were hoping for, but it actually isn’t that effective either.

When it comes to exfoliating, it is much better to do it gently for longer than it is to scrub harder. You’ll get rid of more dead skin without hurting yourself that way.

Ditch the Chemicals
If you can, it is much better to choose products that have few, if any chemicals that you haven’t hear of in your skin. It’s much better to use natural products like coconut oil, aloe vera juice, and brown sugar to create your own cleansers, exfoliants and moisturizers because chemicals can actually inflame your skin and make it puffier and redder, especially if you have sensitive skin. If you’ve noticed that you have a slightly red complexion after completing your skincare routine, chances are you’d definitely be better off without the chemicals.

Avoid the Alcohol
I know, I know - you love a glass of wine or three in the evening and cocktail night is your favourite night of the week, but if you want to have youthful-looking skin in your 40s, 50s and beyond, you really do need to at least cut down on the amount of alcohol you take in. Why? Because alcohol, if you drink more than one glass a day can cause the amount  of oil your body produces to increase, causing shiny skin and enlarged pores., There is also evidence to suggest that heavier drinkers, perhaps because they are often dehydrated, tend to visibly age faster than people who rarely drink at all.

Eat Your Fruits and Veggies
One of the best pieces of advice to bear in mind if you want to have beautiful skin is that there is only so much any skincare routine can do, and truly radiant skin comes from the outside in. Eating a diet that is high in fruits and vegetables, particularly avocados and tomatoes, which are known to maintain healthy skin, and fatty fishes which contain lots of healthy omega 3, will give you the kind of glow that money simply cannot buy.

Cleanse Twice
If you tend to wear a lot of makeup, then cleansing twice can be a very effective way of improving your skin. What you need to do is first remove your makeup and any SPF protection you are wearing, with a mild cleanser that is designed specifically for makeup removal. Once you’ve done that, use a soothing, hydrating cleanser to perk up the skin. Apply this very gently in slight, upward strokes, moving from your neck to your hairline for best results.

Keep Your Skincare Products Cool
If you get a lot of breakouts, or you suffer from acne or red skin, it can really help to keep your products in a cool box or even the fridge, when the weather is hot because cool products, when applied, will cause your blood vessels to constrict, taking away some of the redness you hate.  Good makeup will do the rest.

Avoid Spicy Foods
Avoiding foods containing hot peppers is another good way of reducing redness in the skin. You might want to try it if you have a ruddy complexion and eat a lot of hot foods.

If you try out as many of these skincare tips as are applicable to you, you should definitely see an improvement in the look and feel of your skin, especially if you practice them regularly.

Important Milestones to Hit in Life to Know the Real You

Important Milestones to Hit in Life to Know the Real You 
Life is a roller-coaster ride. It oscillates between ups and downs. Some of the highs and lows are truly significant and help you learn more about yourself and life in general. These milestone moments would almost always facilitate your growth or change you as a person. The following are some of the major milestones in life.

Falling in Love
Falling in love perhaps is the closest you could get to the “heaven on earth” feeling. The sense of contentment you experience upon meeting that special person cannot be explained in words. Almost every human falls in love. It’s a feeling that you are not supposed to seek actively. You fall in love as life progresses. If you are yet to experience this feeling, rest assured your time will come.

A Broken Heart
A love relationship coming to an end can be the exact opposite of what it feels like when you fall in love. These moments are so excruciatingly painful that some just don’t live through to tell the tale. If you’ve had your heart broken for the first time, you may feel like the entire world has drawn its curtains on you. But remember, with time, everything would be alright. Nothing heals a wound better than time. Therefore, don’t waste time fixing your broken relationship. Instead, spend that period on yourself and focus on self-actualisation and reinforce your core values.

Realising Your Passion
The day you know what you want to do in life is the day you find true purpose in life. You cannot force yourself to discover your passion. Like most significant things in life, you accidentally come to know about your passion. Knowing your passion is considered a milestone because most people are yet to find one for themselves. Some people, for instance, are into music, teaching, writing, cooking, gaming and sports. They dilly-dally and waste their time not doing anything concrete.

Losing a Friend
Losing a close friend and realising that the person is most likely never coming back pushes you against the wall and makes you reassess the human in you. It makes you think about whether you are a good friend or person. If not, the experience would help you turn into one. Learning to be a great friend is critical. Once things fall into place, the old friend could possibly make a return.

Getting Your Dream Job
Landing the job of your dreams is bigger than getting your first proper job or even graduating. Upon achieving this milestone, you would feel like having hit a certain high. You would feel extremely proud of yourself and also feel like pampering yourself. If so, consider gifting yourself a luxury watch. It would not just make you feel happy and confident, but the watch would also be a great investment tool – particularly if the watch is a Patek Philippe. Discover Patek Philippe at CHRONEXT.

The last 20 years and me

You may have noticed I have been a bit absent. I have been suffering from my mental health. 10 years ago on Christmas night. I was raped. It impacted me then and now. Yes, it has been 20 years. Yes, every year it gets easier but for some reason, it has hit me like a ton of bricks this year.
I really struggled with the new year. I found my thoughts turned dark and I wanted to curl into a ball and hide. I feel lucky to have made it this far. There were times in the last 20 years I thought I would not be able to continue living.

Let's start with the first few years. I had little to no support after the crime. Not from my family and not from the police. I lived very rurally and to go to a councillor would have been a 3-hour trip each way so 6 hours in total. My family was not willing to do this. You see my attacker was in my family. They wanted it all to disappear. I left home as soon as I could and moved to Edinburgh. to go to college.  I moved in with family But once they got sick of me.  I moved into a rented room. Here is where I found a love of food.

In Edinburgh, I drank too much dropped out of college and started acting. I need to block out my feeling and pain. I felt I was the problem. Here is where I really realised I was on my own in life. Over the next few years, I gained a lot of weight and tipped the scales at a size 24. Food filled a hole inside me.

I was struggling badly. I decided I needed to move closer to home. I enrolled in acting college and moved back up north. The next few years I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. This eventually ended with him cheating on me with a schoolgirl. I was with this person for over 5 years. I lost 7 and a half stone at the end of this relationship.

I had a wonderful friend at this time and she picked me up and helped me get on my feet again. I went back to partying. I got a new job in the police and I finally felt ok. Here I met my now husband and my life was finally getting better.

I went into the police as an officer from a civilian in the police. everything was great until my tutor got a new job and I received a female tutor who went on to bully me. Badly about being dyslexic. I went into a deep depression period. I could not leave my house.

The Christmas before our wedding. There was a huge fall out with my family. After years of no support I finally with my husband's help got rid of them out my life. This made me very ill.

My husband got me a dog. She changed my life. slowly I got well. I left the police. We moved house.
I started blogging.

I have so many things to celebrate in the last 10 year, But mostly it is finding my husband. I am finally loved. I still have a lot of wobbles and I always expect him to leave me. But he is my saviour. I have learned to love myself more. I am slowly getting better at this. This will be an ongoing thing for me.

I can not stand all the fakeness around the holidays. So many people with perfect lives it is intimidating. Except everyone I know does not have perfect lives. They are real. But they post the best of themself online. I will never be that person. If this post does not show that I don't know what will.

I am a rape survivor. I am a cheating survivor. I am an anxiety and depression survivor. I am a self-selected orphan. I have survived when the odds were against me. I am me. I am weak and strong. I am real. I am not Instagramming perfect I am honest.












How to cope when you are down.

Life is a funny thing. No matter your situation there are hurdles in life and challenges. I want to talk about how to cope with life when its mentally challenging and the stress can seem overwhelming. I personally suffer from anxiety and depression. I know the feeling of dread and despair. No matter who you are everyone has dark days. It can be difficult to see any light in the world when things start to close in. 



1. Breath. Yes, I know you are thinking. I am breathing. Stop what you are doing. Move to another room and relax. Sit on the floor and concentrate on your breath. Think about the movement of your body. take a deep breath, Really deep. Count to 5 as you exhale. Do this for 10 minutes. This will centre yourself back to the moment. When you are in grips of a panic attack or dark place. Your mind is flooded with every bad thing you have done or said. Breathing gives you a chance to literary catch a breath. 

2. Lie on the floor and listen to a guided meditation. Personally, I just go on youtube and find one that is over 10 minutes long. Feel yourself on the ground. Let your mind go. Just focus on meditation. 

3. Get a note pad and pen. Write down everything that is bothering you. EVERYTHING. ok, it is now on paper. Now I want you to imagine your best friend or partner has come to you with this list. I want you to write down what you would say to them if this list was theirs? You would tell them not to worry you would give them solutions, would you? This can really help you to work through problems. Try it. 

4. Work out. It doesn't matter your size or shape. Working out is a great way to release stress. This is one of the big things in my life that helps me rebalance. I am not saying hit the gym. But do something that makes you happy. Do you like to walk? Do out and walk. Do you like being on a bike? Get a turbo trainer and spin away. I know a lot of the time when I am going through a dark time. I can not leave the house. So I work out at home. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable just move your body. 

5. Talk. Talk to someone. Your partner,  your best friend, your parent. Just talk. Call the doctor and make an appointment if you need help. This is one of the best things I ever did. We are so lucky to live in a world where there is access to amazing mental health help. 

6. Read a book. This can be any book. Ok, maybe not any book but something that helps you to escape your world into the world of the book. There are also many fantastic self-help books out there try one of them. 

I hope you have liked this post. What do you do to feel better? 









can underfloor heating help with allergies?

living with an allergy, no matter the type of allergy is no fun.
A runny nose, itchy and watery eyes and just a generally groggy
feeling, all of these things can get you down.
One of the most commonplace allergies out there,
as well as one that is hard to avoid or treat is a dust mite allergy.
Not only does it cause the above symptoms, but also, in severe cases
there can be tightness in the chest, shortness of breath and wheezing too.
Whilst hoovering is important to keep your home clean and dust free,
the action of hoovering will actually release dust mites into the air,
as well as walking on the carpet or moving around a rug. You might
not realise it, but radiators are also a huge part of the problem as
they cause the dust to circulate around the home.
This doesn’t mean that you have to resign yourself to a cold and
uninviting home, in fact, underfloor heating might just be the
answer that you are searching for.
How underfloor heating can help with allergies
As we have already discovered, radiators, whilst being effective
at heating your home, are also responsible for dust mite issues too.
When the heat, they create convection, which means that the heat
rises and moves through the air, taking with it the dust.
Underfloor heating doesn’t cause convection to occur, which means
that the hot air doesn’t move around and the dust doesn’t move with it.
Keeping your home warm and your air dust free too. The ideal
combination for those who are trying to cope with their allergies.
Other ways to help beat dust mites in the home
Whilst underfloor heating is an effective way to try and combat dust
mite issues in your home, it isn’t the only thing you can do. It is also
a good idea to opt for wooden floors over carpets as these are much
less likely to hold onto dust and are also easier to clean too.
You should also, where you can try to keep your pets out of your
bedrooms, which is where you are most likely to breathe in and be
aggravated by the dust mites in the air. Of course, this isn’t always
possible, so if you are unable to do this, then make sure that you
wash your bedding as much as you can, as well as dust any pieces
of furniture that could accumulate dust over time too.
Thinking about investing in underfloor heating
If the idea that you could improve the dust levels in your
home is tempting you to purchase underfloor heating, but
you need an extra push. Then take a look at the different
ways that underfloor heating is a great investment.
It can help improve the look of your home- Even the most
designer and stylish of radiators may not look as good as
having a bare wall. Also, they are going to take up space.
By choosing underfloor heating you are going to be able to
get rid of those radiators and really make the room look its best.
It improves the value of your home- Whilst you may have
no plans to sell your home, you never know what is around the corner.
Not only should you think about changes that you can make to
your home in order to make your life easier, but also what is
going to improve the value of your home in the future too.
Something that underfloor heating can do.
It saves you money in your heating bills- No-one likes to have to send out
on their energy bills, however, this is part and parcel of life.
However, that doesn’t mean that you can’t find ways to save money.
Underfloor heating is one of these ways.
If you or anyone else in your home is struggling with allergies or perhaps
asthma symptoms and you want to find a way to help them, perhaps
you should try underfloor heating? Not only is it a fantastic way to heat
your home and ensure that you don’t have to pay a huge energy bill,
but as this article proves, it has other benefits too.

There are a number of ways that you can go, one of which is to invest
in a wet underfloor heating kit. Which is not only easy to install,
but also could boost the value and saleability of your property too.
All good things if you ask me.

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