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On mothering Sunday- Why I am not having children.

Well, I am sat here on Mothering Sunday. Thinking about all things mother. I am that friend you have that. When there was a queue for a ticking biological clock  I was not there. Oops, I hate queues.
 I have thought about my decision long and hard and I am happy with it. I have lots of reasons why I don't want to have children and I thought today would be a good day to share them with you.

There are a lot of assumptions about a woman like me. besides that, I am going against the one thing humans are put on the earth to do.

Let list them and I will answer them with my truth. This is a fun post. It is not intended to offend anyone.

1. You can't have children - as far as I am aware I could have children. I have never undergone any kind of fertility testing But I am assuming everything works.

2. You are selfish- Yes I am. I have never had that part of me that has a need for children. I suffer from mental health problems and I don't want to risk my sanity at this time.  I have no relationship with my mother due to feeling unwanted all my life. I am scared this would be something I would pass on. I know there are people who can not have children and I would gladly help them if I could.

3. You hate children- actually the opposite I love all my friend's children. They are lovely little beings and Yes I am good with them.

4. It is not fair on your husband/partner/ parents in law etc - I have since the start of my relationship been completely honest with my husband That I do not want children. I am lucky that he is the same.

5. You WILL change your mind- I am in my 30's and I haven't changed it yet.

6. You will never feel fulfilled as a woman. - Screw you, I am very happy with my husband and my furbabies.

7. You are using your dogs as surrogate children. - They are my children. Khaleesi has dragons. I have dogs. End off.

8. You will regret it in later life- I really don't think I will. I am happy with the way my life is. Both I and my husband enjoy spending time together. We do not need anyone else in our family. I will go in the same care home regardless if I have children or not.

I could go on. I have actually been in a position. Where someone has asked me why I don't have children and then said to my face "You must have fertility issues?" "You can try IVF?" If I had been having issues conceiving this would have crushed me. Why do people think this is an ok thing to say to anyone?

Our decision seems to give people the right to judge us and our lifestyle. If you are like me. It is ok to not have children. I am not saying this is for everyone. Everyone has the right to choose their life. I love all my friends with children and couldn't be more excited when new babies arrive. This does not mean that my ovaries will start twitching. It means I get to be the fun aunt again. I am happy to stand up for us woman, who has made a choice that childbearing is not for them.  It is, after all, a choice not a necessity in life.

I will always spill my tea on this site.






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